Mars is a Stupid Planet

By Eleanor Chandler

Mars is a stupid planet. Going there
is stupid. Backed up fluid
pressing on your eyes blurring your vision
one percent bone loss each month
oh shit, you never thought about all that
landing in an airless place
too weak to walk part blind a little dizzy
brain damage from gamma rays
you people are assholes throwing away
money we need here
like Michigan’s state motto says: If you
seek a pleasant peninsula
look around you – we have a perfectly
great planet here with unsolved
conundrums like why, when I look at Klimt
do I love how he sees trees
more than how he sees rich and poor ladies
and other problems easy
to solve like how I paid a guy to fix
our screen and now there’s a bee
menacing me impotently outside
it only cost $20 but you
dream only of yourselves
even driving on a foggy evening
down the mountain feeling like
someone’s in the backseat though you’re alone
it isn’t enough for you
out the windows the leaves signal to you
even astronauts describe
our air as thick enough to slice
and spread on toast for breakfast
a legislator here on Earth has said
let’s pass a law outlawing
homosexual spaceflight for the good
of our shared future but here
on Earth beneath the ragged ends of clouds
coming off the Atlantic
we can all lie in my bed and drink wine
and what kind of wine do you
expect to find up there? dusty old wine

Photograph © Cameron Russell

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